Sorry, I couldn’t resist. 
I’m new to the world of bread baking, and I still have a lot to learn. So far, this is my most successful result:
I think my biggest problem with this loaf was that my yeast wasn’t fresh. I’d had it on the pantry shelf for ??? years, after all. I recently learned that yeast can be kept in the fridge or freezer. You just have to bring to room temp to use. Guess where my yeast is now?
Another thing I didn’t know how to do–or that I needed to do it, for that matter–was how to properly proof the yeast, or to “prove” that it was ready to do its thing. It’s actually easy, according to a friend who knows these things:
1) Prepare a measuring cup with 1 cup of warm-to-the-touch water (about 90-100 degrees).
2) Stir in 1 tablespoon of sugar to feed the yeast.
3) Add the yeast packet and stir.
In 5 minutes or so, you should see something that looks like this:
With the holidays approaching, I’m looking forward to baking some more bread. Now that I know a little more about yeast, I should get better results!
Do you have any yeast tips for the newbie baker?